Experience:Lisdexamfetamine (30mg, oral) - Finally feeling functional

Experience index — Lisdexamfetamine

Substance(s): Lisdexamfetamine
Dose: 30mg
Route of Administration: Oral

Subject

Age: 21
Sex: Male
Height: 174cm/5'8"
Weight: 70kg/154lbs
Date: 08/2023
Location: Germany

Background

Miscellaneous: Prescribed for my ADHD as Elvanse, not using recreationally. Very severe executive dysfunction (1.64th percentile according to NAB before starting treatment). No other medications in the week prior.
Tolerances: High caffeine tolerance, moderate-to-low nicotine tolerance, no tolerance to any other stimulants or psychoactives in general.
Set and setting: Home alone on a day off from work and uni. Cautiously optimistic mindset, hoping to make the most of a free day by cleaning up and organizing the apartment, continuing to work on my uni term paper (unsure if that's the right word, Hausarbeit in German), and/or going out to get groceries - tasks that I would normally put off until they got unbearable/the deadline was approaching.

Experience report

Timeline

T+0:00 - 08:20 AM, just woken up. Pill taken on an empty stomach. Continuing to lay in bed and text people/scroll social media as I normally would on a day off.

T+0:45 - Still zero noticeable effect.

T+1:15 - Noticeable sudden increase in energy level and mood lift. Getting up to go shower, without having to force myself into doing it as I would when unmedicated. My vision seems sharper than normal, and colours seem way more vibrant.

T+1:43 - Finished showering, drying hair. Normally, when showering, I would have a cacophony of "earworms"/INMI consisting of 5-second loops of different songs and internal monologue (not as full-blown auditory hallucinations, it felt the same way neurotypical/normal people describe earworms). This time, the music was still present, but as full-length songs, which was much more pleasant. They and the internal monologue were much more under my control, and I was able to "shut them off" later and enjoy the sound of water flowing over me. That felt unbelievably nice - unsure if it was due to the mood lift from the drug, or due to finally getting some silence in my head for once.

T+2:00 - Noticed I'm actually able to plan my next activities logically - another normal function I used to lack. Namely, collecting all the trash and recycling, washing/cleaning the surfaces they were on, then taking out said trash and recycling on the way to the grocery store. Normally, I would start cleaning up, then remember I needed to buy food, and immediately drop what I was doing and go to the store. This essentially doubled my workload for chores, as the recycling receptacles are on the way to the store, but quite far away. After coming back from the store, I wouldn't have the energy to finish cleaning up, and my apartment would gradually fill up with plastic and cardboard/paper.

T+2:27 - Executed the above plan, writing this down while walking back home. I feel like I was much friendlier to other people, which is nice - but also feeling a bit anxious about being too friendly and/or people knowing I'm on this drug. Not sure why they would know, or why that would be bad, it's a medication prescribed to me and legally acquired, but it still makes me anxious and almost paranoid. First mildly unpleasant experience of the day.

T+2:33 - Came home from the store to a clean apartment for probably the first time since I moved out. Feeling absolutely ecstatic - again, not sure if it's the mood-lifting effect or just being happy from being able to function like a normal human being.

T+2:35 - Sudden, quite severe vertigo. Just realized it's probably because I haven't eaten anything today and skipped dinner yesterday; still feeling zero hunger. Going to try and have breakfast anyway.

T+2:41 - Another instance of proper functioning! Put the kettle on to make tea, and while it was coming up to temp, washed the dishes that had piled up. Normally I wouldn't trust myself to do that, as I'd get distracted and forget about the kettle, which, with a gas stove, could be dangerous. Having breakfast without any problems, the hunger "appeared" as soon as I took the first bite. Made it more protein-heavy than usual, since that's supposed to extend the effects a bit. Hopefully it's not too late for that.

T+3:00 - Talked to my fiancé and my parents on the phone (separately, obviously). My fiancé knows about the meds, while my parents don't. Both said I was a lot more talkative and giddy than usual, but not to an unpleasant/worrying degree. If anything, they were happy to see me being energetic in a positive way for once. Feeling somewhat less paranoid about that now, albeit, reading my notes so far, I realize they're also far more verbose than they need to be. Going to edit out the most superfluous parts later, but leave most of it in, as kind of another way to show my mental state in contrast to the onset/comedown stages. Starting to work on my term paper now, so notes will likely (hopefully?) get less frequent and shorter.

T+4:58 - They did, in fact, get less frequent. I'm amazed at what I was able to do. A full hour of research and almost the same time writing, without a single break, distraction, or daydream. Not only that, but it's much more efficient; I can finally scan through to the content I need, then read it carefully, instead of scanning through everything or reading everything word by word. I can also make logical conclusions much faster, everything just falls into place in my brain immediately. Making far fewer typos, too. Going to continue to make as much use of this as I can before it wears off.

T+7:13 - More of the above. I've probably made more progress today than I had in the past two weeks. Slowly starting to lose energy, so I'll keep this note short to squeeze the most out of the effect.

T+7:44 - Definitely deep into offset now. Most of my energy is gone, so I've decided to take a break (or wrap up for the day, not sure). Concentration is also lower, and the visual enhancements are gone. The euphoric feeling from earlier is still there, and just as, if not more intense, so I think it's really just genuine emotions from finally functioning properly, rather than an effect of the drug. Overall, I'm pretty satisfied with what I was able to achieve - the only negatives were the constant breaks to go to the bathroom. At least that means I didn't forget to hydrate, I guess.

T+8:28 - All the positives are completely gone. I'm back to my old dysfunctional self. Kinda disappointed - I thought it would work a bit longer. Feeling quite irritable, anxious, and very untalkative. Thoughts are completely disorganized, though thankfully not more so than before the medication. Definitely not gonna be able to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

T+9:10 - Slowly becoming actually sober. Still quite bitter about the short duration. Considering asking my psych about an instant-release "booster" (maybe Methylphenidat, to slow down tolerance buildup a bit?) next month, but very worried about the higher addiction/abuse risk. At the deepest part of the offset, I was even considering redosing with what I have now. It wasn't a strong compulsion, but the fact that the thought even cropped up is unsettling me somewhat.

T+16:20 - Went to bed 20 minutes ago to try and get a full 8 hours. Can't fall asleep. (Addendum from next morning: I ended up falling asleep around 2 hours afterwards. Suboptimal.)

Summary from the next day, sober: I'm very satisfied, thinking back on it. I imagine taking a short break while studying would've helped the comedown not be as harsh - plus, if I keep this tempo up, I'll have finished writing and proofreading the paper two weeks before the deadline, so I don't have to push myself this hard. Even if the comedown stays this bad, the amazing increase in productivity and functionality is worth it, as long as I can keep myself from falling into redosing/addiction. Will try taking it with breakfast next time, that might help.

I ended up deleting about a fifth of the text from the notes between T+1:15 and T+3:00, as they were completely unnecessary. Wish I could've done that to the things I said to people in person/on the phone. I'll definitely need to control this excessive talkativeness if I continue using it. The rest of the side effects weren't that bad.

Submitted by Anonymous